○Ego
The "self" or ego is thought and mind. The self cannot become no-minded.
In order not to be swept away by thoughts, it is necessary to know about the self.
There are two types of thoughts. One is thoughts that spontaneously pop up unconsciously. The other is thoughts that are made intentionally, such as planning. The former includes anxiety, anger, regret, inferiority, desire, etc., coming from past memories or predictions for the future, and there are thoughts that disappear immediately and thoughts that strongly occupy the brain and stay. The latter is used when necessary.
Most thoughts are re-screenings of past memories.
Being born as a human means that everyone has an ego. Unconscious thoughts are triggered by past memories. Behind thoughts, there are words and actions, which form individuality and character. If the past is full of failures, the feeling of inferiority becomes strong, confidence is lost, and proactivity is lost. Conversely, if there are many successes, it leads to a positive and proactive mindset. For these reasons, humans tend to repeat the same actions and encounter the same problems.
The self called "I" repeats past memories → spontaneous thoughts unconsciously → emotions → words and actions → personality → life experience → past memories. The end of this life cycle is when becoming no-minded and existing as consciousness is habitual.
When asked "Who are you?", the answer is, my name is ◯◯◯◯, I am a Japanese woman, I work in sales, I am a university graduate, I have patience, I am quick to anger, I laugh a lot, I am slow on my feet, I used to play tennis, my hobby is mountain climbing, etc. These are descriptions of my past memories and experiences, explaining the self. This is not the real me, it is a thought, not the fundamental form of human consciousness.
The ego is thought, it is the mind, it is desire, it strongly asserts itself as "I", prioritizing oneself. It is insidious, thick and sticky, persistent, resentful, detestable, dictatorial, self-centered, ugly, vulgar, impudent, stubborn, crafty, shameless, dishonest, irresponsible, elusive, never content, greedy, arrogant, steals from others, always calculating losses and gains, unwilling to share, unfair, insincere, boastful, has a sense of superiority, suffers from strong paranoia, is addictive, expectant, disappointed, dark, unhappy, suffering, black, suspicious, malicious, cruel, aggressive, oppressive, threatening, imposing, violent, wild, mean-spirited, prone to bullying, extremely volatile, noisy, restless, dislikes boredom, unstable, messy, dirty, chaotic, disorderly, exclusive, rejecting, polarizing, factional, discriminatory, binding, small-minded, has a strong inferiority complex, is shy, servile, showy, proud, hates to lose, likes to stand out, is bashful, has a strong desire for recognition, exaggerates self-importance, is fearful, weak, miserable, lonely, sorrowful, desperate, frustrated, lacks affection, hedonistic, addictive, sensitive, easily hurt, and encompasses all negative aspects.
Humans have the foundation of love called consciousness, but the cloud of ego covers its surface. As the cloud of ego becomes thinner, people's words and actions become more loving.
The more a person is trapped in their ego, the worse their personality becomes. The less they are trapped, the better their personality becomes.
Ignorance about consciousness and ego continues to create problems and suffering.
By realizing that one is constantly tormented by thoughts that arise unconsciously, one can distance oneself from the ego.
The stronger the entrapment in the ego, the greater and more intense the suffering in life becomes.
When trapped in ego, foolish actions increase. When people appear foolish, it's when they are acting only considering themselves. Even those who are academically accomplished can be foolish, and those who are not academically inclined can be pure and correct.
Those who act on desire ultimately self-destruct.
They build by desire, and they destroy by desire.
If your pride is high, a time will come when your nose will be broken. Pride is also part of the ego referred to as "I". Life is designed to make us experience shame at some point.
The stronger the desire, the greater the pain one experiences, making one aware of bad habits. Those with little desire notice with smaller pain.
People suffer because of the ego. However, suffering provides an opportunity for deep growth in humanity.
Having an ego leads to experiencing deep sorrow, but this cultivates empathy for others.
Having an ego leads to both frustration and despair. When people despair, they see the door of death in front of them, and every day they are faced with the choice of dying or enduring.
There is a certain landscape that becomes visible when you feel despair. Endless gray clouds, yourself standing on the edge of a cliff, yourself immersed in a poison swamp, or the sight of yourself falling alone into a deep hole. At those moments, you may feel as if you will never recover.
When you are in despair, there are few friends you can talk to about it. Despair can only be empathized with by those who have experienced despair. When people are truly suffering, they do not speak to others.
When things are going well, you gain confidence and feel like you can do anything. The advice you give to others becomes more positive. However, when you can no longer ride that wave, the ego loses confidence with alarming ease. Actions dependent on confidence are fragile. A normal state of mind that is not bound by the presence or absence of confidence comes from no-mind.
Events in life, whether good or bad, are neutral. It is thought that assigns meaning to them, and past memories determine it.
The ego separates friends from enemies, but there is no such distinction in consciousness.
When you exist as consciousness, there is no thought, so there is neither forward nor backward. Actions that appear positive often conceal fear or anxiety behind them. When acting as consciousness, there is no fear or anxiety.
The ego, always looking outside of the body, observes the words and actions of others well. However, it does not see its own inner state. Therefore, it tends to blame others for its failures, resulting in no learning or growth. To become no-mind means to look inside oneself. Those less bound by their ego are more likely to think that the cause may lie within themselves. In other words, they observe themselves closely, reflect, learn, and grow.
Resistance is one of the ego's reactions.
When you try to change someone's personality, they sense it. Then, their ego resists, becoming stubborn in order not to lose.
When you are bound by the ego, you become self-centered and even if you cause trouble for someone and are cautioned, you consider yourself the victim and do not admit your wrongdoing. Therefore, it is meaningless to fight with the other person's ego, and their ego will only persistently flee.
The ego hates to lose and will do whatever it takes not to admit defeat and to win.
The ego will perform acts that anyone would consider brutal and terrible. And those with strong egos justify it.
Justice doesn't matter to the ego. As long as it wins and gains, that's all that matters.
Those with strong egos have strong self-assertion, and discussions with them are unproductive. They speak from the perspective that they are the victims and the others are to blame, lacking a fair and objective viewpoint.
Consciousness acts upon humans and the world through intuition and events. That action is harmony. Within that consciousness, the ego's desire seeks to acquire in a small range, unaware of such action. That small desire can never win against the infinitely expanding consciousness that includes it.
Being of great capacity as a human means how much one can be free from ego, become no-minded, and have love for others. Being of small capacity indicates the strength of the ego that excludes others and prioritizes "I".
Feeling angry when criticized by others is the ego's defensive instinct that you've been hurt, you want to protect yourself. At times, that is referred to as being of small capacity. When you become emotional, you become aware of your ego, and it is easy to see what you are clinging to. When you exist as consciousness, you do not react or care about being criticized.
The "I" being hurt, that's what the ego fears.
When you are bound by the ego, you think that accepting advice from others is a defeat. As the ego diminishes, you start to appreciate advice.
Growing up in a world of winning and losing like sports during your teens leaves a habit of interacting with people based on winning and losing even as an adult. Even in trivial conversations, they try to be superior to the other person. It's difficult to deal with and annoying. And they are not aware of this habit.
The ego always creates someone to attack. It immerses itself in a sense of superiority, thinking it's better than the other person, hoping for their downfall - this happens in workplaces and schools alike.
When the ego sees something bigger or more abundant than itself, it feels inferior. Conversely, when it sees something smaller or less, it feels superior.
Understanding your ego and calming your mind, you start to see other people's egos more clearly.
The more you understand your ego, the clearer the reasons for others' words and actions become.
People with strong egos, those with less ego, and those who exist as consciousness all tend to have similar patterns of behavior. People with similar degrees of ego attachment find each other's company comfortable and gather as friends. However, stronger egos lead to more conflicts, while less ego leads to fewer.
A strong ego leads to dishonesty. No matter how beautiful the words of a dishonest person may be, their true intentions will eventually be revealed through their words and actions. What they say and what they do don't match.
The ego tends to exaggerate even ordinary events when communicating with others. The mind is always judging things in terms of superiority, inferiority, good, and bad. This tendency is weaker in children but grows stronger as they become adults.
The ego changes its attitude depending on the person it's interacting with. The stronger the ego, the more it tends to view human relationships hierarchically. It flatters and raises its tone to those it sees as superior, and it behaves arrogantly and lowers its tone to those it sees as inferior. People of the same type feel comfortable with each other and tend to gather together. When this type becomes a leader, similar types gather around, shaping the culture of the organization.
When a person with a strong ego becomes a boss, they treat their subordinates oppressively, and the subordinates cannot express their opinions and obediently follow. The subordinates also treat their underlings oppressively, and the underlings cannot express their opinions and obediently follow. This cycle repeats. Just as happiness and suffering are two sides of the same coin, sadism and masochism are also two sides of the same coin and are characteristics of the ego.
The ego of the lower subordinate shrinks from expressing its opinion for fear of angering the upper subordinate. Seeing this, the upper subordinate becomes frustrated, criticizes the lower subordinate, and demands improvement. However, the ego of the upper subordinate also hates being scolded by the boss, so they can't clearly express their opinion. Seeing this, the lower subordinate thinks, "You're just like me." Since the ego always looks outside rather than inside, it's hard to notice these contradictions. This is what happens in human social organizations.
The ego is weak to things that seem big and strong, such as the authority or power of others. When faced with an opponent it can't beat, it shrinks and becomes a yes-man. Conversely, the ego tends to look down on leaders who are merely kind, finding them easy to deal with. To deal with people with strong egos, a leader needs not only sincerity but also strength.
Staff who blindly follow their leader's words or feel fear towards the leader tend to mimic the leader's behavior, such as treating others casually. Conversely, if the leader respects someone, they tend to follow suit. These obedient actions stem from the ego, such as lack of self-confidence, fear, and self-preservation. People with less ego attachment treat everyone with love, regardless of how the leader treats others, because they are not bound by fear.
Being timid or unable to assert oneself does not mean that one's ego is weak. Behind these behaviors lie a lack of self-confidence, a desire not to be disliked (self-protection), and stubbornness. Being in a state of no-mind allows one to have a normal attitude without being bound by these issues.
The ego envies successful people within reach and admires those beyond its reach.
The ego wants to interfere when it sees someone in front of it profiting.
Whenever you achieve success, big or small, someone somewhere will always be jealous of you. In a society where people haven't overcome their egos' desire for more, everyone feels a sense of lack. Therefore, to those who are not doing what they love or are not doing well, the stories of those who are enjoying what they do may seem boastful and dazzling.
The ego calculates gains and losses, so it smiles and talks in front of others, but curses them when they're not around. If you're not aware of this, you might become mistrustful of people, but since this kind of behavior is normal for the ego, it's better not to worry about it.
Humans argue because of their egos.
People who dislike humans dislike not the person themselves, but the actions of the person's "self," their ego. That's why they might like children and animals. Those without developed cognitive abilities are free of malice. There are also people with developed cognitive abilities but thin egos.
Being shy is also a function of the ego. Not knowing what to talk about with others, or worrying about what others think, are all thoughts. When you become no-minded, such thoughts do not arise, and you neither actively initiate conversation nor become passive, but just talk normally or stay silent.
Feeling uncomfortable with silence when a conversation stops is a sign of anxiety and overthinking. When you become no-minded, you stop caring about such things.
A strong sense of inferiority can sometimes give birth to a desire to appear grand, to become important, to be seen as such. This can motivate the creation of something, such as starting a business, seeking power or titles, or becoming ostentatious.
People with strong feelings of inferiority or envy often try to embarrass others in conversation or deliberately point out what they care about. This makes them feel superior. They might feel victorious in the moment, but in the long run, they will be disliked. If they have a bad personality, it's hard to maintain good relationships, and wherever they go, the same kind of relationships will be formed.
The ego, when it is concerned about a part of itself, looks at the same place in the person it interacts with. It compares itself with the other person, and it reassures itself or becomes anxious, or even feels superior, based on the comparison. This can be about the body, possessions, abilities, etc. The ego feels insecure about the imperfect "I". There is no such thing as an imperfect "I" in no-mindedness, so there is no anxiety.
Pointing out another person's ego, such as their feelings of inferiority or envy, can sometimes lead to their realization and improvement, but it can also cause resentment. It depends on the relationship and the situation.
People with a strong ego often hold grudges and anger, especially when they feel they have been wronged.
When confronted with intense anger or fear, you may feel a reaction in your abdomen or elsewhere, such as a stomachache from stress. Even if you become no-minded, the signs of calming down may not appear immediately, and it requires concentration and patience. Looking directly at your angry ego is effective for moving away from anger. If anger continues for a long time, it can lead to illness.
The ego gossips and speaks ill of others. Generally, at such times, it slightly alters the story to suit its purposes and speaks in a way that belittles the other person. The listener, hearing only this one-sided information, may take it as the whole truth. It's not fair unless you hear both sides. But if the subject of the rumor is a person with little ego attachment, they tend to explain only the facts without making excuses or criticizing, and do not stoop to the level of the person spreading the gossip. For a calm and pure person, engaging in insidious and vulgar actions is not an option.
Those who spread bad rumors about others everywhere are being swayed by their ego. Therefore, they try to make themselves look good or expect someone else to fail. Therefore, they distort the truth when they speak. People with thin egos don't gossip about others or spread bad rumors in the first place.
When someone gossips, some of the listeners may think, "I wonder if they're saying bad things about me somewhere else." As a result, they start withholding their true feelings from the gossip-lover, and people with good character begin to distance themselves.
When someone criticizes you, you may want to retort or make excuses. Even in such times, remaining patient and silent can be a training to not be swayed by the ego.
The ego tends to get angry when it seems like one's faults are about to be exposed. This is the resistance of the ego that refuses to admit defeat.
People who often complain are rarely able to build harmonious relationships, whether in their families or workplaces.
The more the ego diminishes, the more independent a person becomes. Thus, the dependence on others decreases. However, everyone has an ego and therefore a sense of dependency, which can make human relationships tiring. Therefore, it's necessary to consider distance. Some relationships work well because you only meet once every few months. Some relationships work better when you meet every day. Even if you meet every day, a relationship may work well if you only meet for 2 hours a day, but it may become stressful if it becomes 8 hours. Even with a lover, there are times when you want to be alone after spending several days together. Considering the frequency of meeting based on the compatibility with the other person can reduce problems in relationships, whether it's with family, a lover, or friends.
Being conscious means to be independent. Dependence on others also comes from thought, such as wanting to be with someone because you feel lonely, or always asking the same person for help.
The higher the degree of dependence in a relationship, the easier it deteriorates, whether in work or interpersonal relationships.
While humans seem to be choosing their own lives, they are actually unconsciously repeating actions influenced by past memories. Women who are often cheated on tend to always choose men likely to cheat. Men who get into debt often fall into situations where they repeatedly get into debt.
Bullies have something in common. They are people with a strong ego of "I". Those who are more captive to the ego and bully others often engage in aggressive behavior such as violence. Because they only see themselves, their ability to empathize with others' pain is low.
People with strong egos tend to have more likes and dislikes of others, which can cause exclusion and division within an organization.
People with bad personalities are aware that they have unpleasant personalities, but they can't easily change themselves. This is because they are not aware that they are being swayed by thoughts that occur unconsciously every day.
The ego can take extremely cold actions such as ignoring or severing relationships, but on the other hand, once it has accepted someone, it can also show a strong sense of obligation. Consciousness, on the other hand, is not trapped by either, and shows the same love regardless of the attitude of the other person.
Spontaneous thoughts lead to words and actions. If the content is verbal abuse or violence, it becomes a painful experience for the person on the receiving end. This behavior is also triggered by past memories. Unless you realize this, the act of hurting others will not heal. Deep emotional wounds can easily occupy the mind through intense spontaneous thoughts, leading to negative behavior.
Children who were not blessed with the affection of parents or others in their early childhood, or who experienced discrimination or abuse, may eventually engage in delinquent or antisocial behavior, causing trouble for those around them. The person themselves may be feeling deep loneliness and act out in order to get attention from others. For example, like making noise with cars or motorcycles to attract someone's attention to fill the emptiness in their heart. Such behavior also comes from past memories as spontaneous thoughts, which determine the person's words and actions. If the person causes a lot of trouble, they will incur the resentment of those around them, and this can lead to a vicious cycle of further rebellion. Even for this, becoming no-minded can lead to resolution. It's necessary to exist consciously, observe thoughts carefully, recognize when past memories are automatically replayed as temporary, return to being no-minded, and make this a habit. Then, what is needed is a real determination to make this a habit.
People who treat themselves roughly are also treated roughly by others. People who cherish themselves are also cherished by others.
If you're usually lacking in confidence, you may receive more instructions or attacks from others. The ego is always looking for a target to attack, and it can sense people who lack confidence through their aura. Such people make the perfect target. In jobs or sports where results must be achieved, if you lack confidence, you may be blamed by your peers. Their ego fears losing or being disadvantaged. Overconfidence leads to complacency, but being no-minded means not being trapped by confidence or lack thereof.
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